Friday, August 23, 2013

Never Mind

Talked off the Ledge by B F Koch
ITITY Political Analyst

Every time a bell rings in Texas one of Ted Cruz’s brain cells sprouts tiny little bat wings, escapes his otherwise empty skull, flies around the town hall for a few seconds, then goes on yet another rant about defunding Obamacare.

Secret border patrol agent and part-time cantaloupe inspector, Steve King continues to pile more stupidity on top of a pile of stupid every time his single misfiring neuron comes up with a comment on immigration reform.

A lump of moldy gray matter haunting the halls of justice in a rotten black robe, Antonin Scalia envisions an America where robber barons can once again buy elections and only wealthy old white men are allowed to vote.

Intoxicated with the idea of immortality, and bored with simply being a young Russian billionaire, soon to be cyborg Dmitry Itskov plans on indefinitely extending his lifespan by putting the contents of his cranium in a shiny robot body.

At a lonely, dimly lit bar, Literally and Begs-the-Question, two friends suffering from the modern misuse of language, buy each other drinks and reminisce about the good ole days when their meanings actually had lives.

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