Filed by F. Russell Grumman
ITITY Revisionist History Correspondent
In light of Sarah Palin’s rewrite of history and her not surprisingly fervent defense of her recent description of Paul Revere’s ride as historically accurate, the Daughters of the American Revolution’s Historical Society has removed from display its original copy of The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere.
The Society’s scholar in residence of over 50 years, 84 year old Clara Potts, said she was saddened by this development, but felt she had no choice but to remove the offending work, now that Palin has deemed it historically inaccurate. Potts went on to say, “Although Ms. Palin may never have read the poem or even attended her High School history class when the American Revolution was studied, there is little doubt that, since she is such a great patriot, that she could be wrong.”
Accordingly, said Ms. Potts, “We have referred the matter to our Revisionist History and Literature Advisor, Donald Rumsfeld, who will see to it that an appropriate version of the famous poem is soon on display."
Shown here for the first time is the draft revision of the first three verses:
Twas the eighteenth of April in ’75,
And hardly a mama grizzly now is alive.
That knows of, or remembers that famous day, and year,
And the warning to the British of Paul Revere.
One if by land and two if by sea,
He told them foreigners to let us be.
Then round the town he quickly rode,
Tellin’ folks to lock ‘n load!
Were goin’ to war with the army we got,
Even if really an army it’s not.
Ole Paul shouted to folks near and far,
Let’s stop them world governmenters on this here spot!