Monday, March 28, 2011

Michelle Bachmann Under Observation

Filed by F. Russell Grumman
ITITY 2012 Campaign Field Reporter

Rochester MN

Doctors announced at a press conference this morning that Michelle Bachmann had been admitted to the prestigious Mayo Clinic after babbling incoherently and hyperventilating during a taping of the Sean Hannity show.

Dr. Sergio Aioli, Director of Rare Disease Research, stated the Minnesota Congresswoman was undergoing tests even though her staff assured him that such symptoms were normal for her appearances on FOX News.

The doctor said he was still concerned by her dilated and unresponsive pupils and her inability to answer standard lucidity questions such as "Was the President of the United States born in the United States?"

Bachmann initially resisted EMT’s declaiming that she "would not be silenced by the corrupt and criminal Obama Administration" and that the helicopter being used was actually "part of a conspiracy by socialists in conjunction with the UN and New World Order to take her to a secret FEMA internment camp”.

Awakened from sedation, surrounded by people dressed in white and wearing masks, she asked if she was in Iowa for a Tea Party caucus or in South Carolina for a patriotic birthday celebration of the Civil War General and Ku Klux Klan founder, Nathaniel Bedford Forrest.

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